Weighing In on The War Against Women

 

 

War is a state of armed conflict between different nations or states or different groups within a nation or state. Now, a conflict has been described as one in which a political party is at war with women.  I am a woman – and wonder how to respond, lest I am caught in the cross hairs of one faction or another.

The weapons are words – some portend personal legislative and economic changes that could deny many of the rights I enjoy. Other words hurt – suggesting that how one woman chose to live her life invalidates her political opinions. And this re-kindled some memories of skirmishes I encountered in the late 70’s and ‘80’s. 

I sympathize with Ms. Rosen – she revealed an opinion, as did a radio personality a few weeks ago, which generated heat, but not much light. Both Ms. Rosen and Mr. Limbaugh expressed opinions that represent opposite and deeply felt convictions about how we [should] live. However, in the on-going clash of deeply held convictions, making our political points so personal impedes conversation.   

Waging war with words can lead to battles that secure no peace.

Staying home to raise our kids was our choice – a choice based on our sense that personally and economically it made sense for us.  When we flirted with the idea of me going to work outside the home, running a few of the numbers showed us the return on that investment would be minimal.  However, the decision dismayed one of our kids: most of their friends’ moms worked --- and that I did not was a bit of an embarrassment.

In the ensuing years, I thought we were past the implication that women who chose to stay home were not as equally informed citizens as women who worked and men. I thought that “choice” included other decisions than simply reproductive rights.

Accusing our political parties of  “waging war” on other Americans shuts off the conversation that we Americans should be thinking about – the role of government in our daily lives, as well as our national life.  Getting personal, like Ms. Rosen and Mr. Limbaugh did, obscure the ability to see how women around the world are denied liberties that American women enjoy.   

When I read about how people live in many other countries, if even a portion of the reports is a true, Americans should take a good long look at what we have (warts and all) and get off demonizing each other. 

·      Women, who work in the home or outside the home or both, know economic realities.

·      Women who are battling their own, or loved ones’ disabling diseases know a thing or two about health care and medical insurance.

·      Women all know that our children face dangers and opportunities that were unimaginable when we were growing up. We all worry about how to communicate with them so we can pass along want we have learned.   

·      Women who care for their parents while caring for their own families or themselves know about the limits of Medicare and Social Security.

·      Women whose spouses or sons have gone to war know its cost in ways no one else does, except men whose wives and daughters have been killed or maimed.   

Our news and social media outlets are purveyors of arms (warring words and images) that are escalating our conflicts. See the brouhaha they fomented by blogs and tweets about SC Governor Nikki Haley’s income taxes!   Whether and how they might restrain their “sales” of these weapons are worthwhile questions.

Alas, there’s scant profit in being civil.  

A Bully

 

He came into the framing shop fifteen minutes after I did; perhaps 15 years my junior, he was well dressed in crisp chinos, and an oxford cloth shirt. He was joking about getting a free fame. He wanted a poster framed as cheaply as possible, he informed the proprietor of the custom framing and gallery shop.  I was looking for a bargain, too.

I listened to his friendly banter – banter that quickly became an angry diatribe about the debt ceiling problems embroiling Washington.  He went on a great length how everything would collapse – everything, including this shop, would go belly-up immediately because of the bull-headed congressmen who would not just raise the debt ceiling and put off their agenda until later.  He kept it up – talking at the proprietor who remained unflustered but quiet, as she continued estimating the cost of his framing.

When he got the estimate, he became discourteous – exclaiming how could such a little job cost so much.  She offered an option that would have saved him thirty dollars – but he curtly dismissed it. He then asked that the print be wrapped up in brown paper and said he’d think about if the framing of such a print would be worth the money and left.

Very little oxygen remained in the shop. I wonder if this man even wondered how he sounded?

The incivility that passes for political dialogue is depressing on the airwaves, and discouraging on a person-to-person level. It reminds me of the tone emanating from the late ‘60’’s.

I wish I had had answers to each of this man’s accusations and assumptions. But, frankly, I am on information overload.  Some of what he said made sense – but much of it didn’t. However his railing to strangers, and then demeaning the cost of the product for which he asked made it seem like Potomac fever had infected Severna Park.

I don’t have the answer to the current financial crises – it boggles my mind how what seems so simple is so complex. Doug and I are frequently tightening our belts when we catch ourselves overspending.  It is not fun – but when the money is gone what are the other choices?

I want the leaders  -- from the feds to the locals - to stop borrowing and spending – making us think we are entitled to benefits we truly have not earned.  Now if the leaders have been poor stewards – own up to it; if you are trying to clean up a mess someone else, quit whining; you asked for the job! Get working on the solution, or get out of the way so others can. But don’t bully bystanders.

"Words! Words! Words! I'm So Sick of Words!”

Eliza Doolittle sang, and I wonder: How many words does it take to describe evil?

It appears a mentally disturbed person legally bought a weapon, murdering and injuring many people: a federal judge, a child, an US Congresswoman, and five other souls. We don’t know how he could do this, or why. This has not stopped speculations – and common decency doesn’t seem much of a restraint with so many open mikes.

The talking heads inundate viewers and listeners with so many words unconnected to facts – and all are caught up in a swirl of unmediated grief, shame and horror. Do those who operate the news think the more they talk the more they can keep the evil at bay?

Could all these news “stars” just shut up – maybe enforce silence, broken only by solemn music? Maybe they could give us time to think about the fact that what is normal in Mexico and Iraq and Afghanistan just visited the USA, destroying the lives of several people on a sunny morning in a suburban shopping center in Arizona?

After the bloody rampage in Tucson Americans can’t make any sense out of the evil,  although we have more than fifty hours of commentary on cable and network news. The folks I usually listen to are as inane as the ones I avoid: all are reporting gossip, repeating baseless opinions and asking embarrassingly intrusive questions to people still processing the horror of what they saw or heard, or tried to help.

“Gotcha”sound bites repeated ad nauseam do not equip us to stand against evil – much less stand together. ( Isaiah 57:1)