Where’d All that "Glorious Texas" Weather Go?

It always happens.

I get all my winter clothes sorted, cleaned and stored; my spring and summer clothes arranged and culled, and the weather changes from warm and balmy to chilly and damp. All that “glorious” Texas sunshine is playing hide and seek – quickly disappearing.

All my newly planted flowers look alarmingly defenseless as the squirrels are still burrowing for the remains of last years acorns. I shooed off one fat and furry fellow from the edge of the pot in which I hope the freesia will flourish.

And I am as thankful for our gas fireplace logs, as I was at Christmas a year ago.

“[S]he who sits by the fire, thankless for the fire, is just as if [s]he had no fire. Nothing is possessed save in appreciation, of which thankfulness is the indispensable ingredient.” (W.J. Cameron, an 19th century explorer and entrepreneur)

“. . . Nothing is possessed save in appreciation . . .”

My appreciation of my family’s safety is deepened by a recent photo of a young Japanese woman sitting, knees clasped, mourning, amidst the rubble of what may have been her home. So many Japanese parents lost their children, so many children, their parents – brothers gone, sisters, lost – the comfortable familiar is now a nightmare. Just as so many Haitians lost their families.

We live in days wherein the luxury of gratifying anger, nurturing resentment, or perpetuating misunderstandings is prohibitively expensive. The cosmos is too changeable – and life is too short to abuse the relationships God has established.

Some aids so you may more fully appreciate the folks around you:

A patient man has great understanding,
but a quick-tempered man displays folly.
A heart at peace gives life to the body,
but envy rots the bones. (Proverbs 14:29-30)

A man's wisdom gives him patience;
it is to his glory to overlook an offense. (Proverbs 19:11)

Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit,
for anger resides in the lap of fools. (Ecclesiastes 7:9)

"In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. (Ephesians 4:26-27)

It’s NEVER Too Late!

She blurted out her frustration: her children, aged six and eight, fight all the time. Listening, I was tempted to respond – I held back; I didn’t want to be overwhelming in the "meet and greet" segment of the worship service. But I thought about her frustration during the sermon, remembering the shame I felt when our little “Christian” family scraped and fought with each other.

Because I wince still when I think about the stupid escalating quarrels, I didn’t want this dear young mom to give up on the most important ministry to her kids who are fighting. So at the end of the service, I took her hand. She now looked stunned as it was my turn to blurt out my heart: I told her, it may sound crazy, but she has a high calling in the midst of fighting children. I told her not get tired or give up teaching her kids how to resolve their arguments. If we want our kids to be blessed, and called sons of God, we must teach and model peacemaking.

Yes – I know it means more work – more tears – and many, many more prayers to know how to be a peacemaker amidst fights, remembering that this is a high calling – one that the church sometimes fails to do.

Twenty years ago nobody in our church seemed candid about their family fights – and I sure was not going to be the first one to expose the problems. So Doug and I stumbled along until we started searching for and applying some Scriptures. Later we were introduced to peacemaking principles through Peacemaker Ministries. (The 4 G's) They remind us if we would be reconciled to God, we must be reconciled to each other.

Conflict is an opportunity to glorify God, Ken Sande, Peacemaker Ministries, founder. This is hard to remember when – for the umpteenth time – the kids start fighting. These fights have prompted many to call “Super-Nanny,” an engrossing character on a reality show. She shows frazzled families how introducing a firm, loving hand, a simple system of warnings, disciplines and rewards, and practicing them consistently brings order to disorderly homes. How much more will God help us when we come under His care, learning to apply His principles!

Here’s a starting point: Peacemaker Ministries has organized some Scripture into acronyms, one of which is the 4-G’s.( Link)

Glorify God
Get the log out of your own eye
Gently restore
Go and be reconciled.

Think about the 4-G’s when your kids fight. I know, dear mom, you are tired – hurting – and perhaps at your wits’ end. Your kids’ fighting horrifies and dismays you – but you are there for a reason, and it isn’t just to keep giving them time-outs or threatening them with their father’s wrath. You are their teacher who points them to Christ, the only Mediator between God and them, and shows them the power that is theirs when they learn how to please God, and use disciplined, loving words to describe how they feel. It’s not too late!

Reconciliation

 

“It is preferable to separate rather than patch up our differences.” That conviction guided my upbringing and soured many relationships. When I became a Christian, I hoped never again to suffer broken relationships because of “differences.”

So, discovering that squabbles happened among believers devastated me; realizing that *I* had a bone to pick with some Christians blew my mind.   I had walked away from many people with nary a backward glance  — but leaving the relationships that Christ was forming was excruciating. Somehow, every time I tried to explain why I would no longer be speaking to so-and-so, I could hear the Lord clear His throat. The longer I persisted in avoiding a person, the more he or she came to mind, especially during the Lord’s Supper. My excuses were never sufficient “justification.”

Okay, Lord. What do You want?

 “Barbara, when you are angry with your sister, you shall be guilty before the court; and when you say to your sister, 'Raca,' you shall be guilty before the supreme court; and when you  say, 'You fool,' shall be guilty enough to go into the fiery hell.” (Matt 5:22 )

  “Oh no, Lord — I didn’t mean she was a fool — just misguided.”

 "Barbara, if therefore you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your sister has something against you,  leave your offering there before the altar, and go your way; first be reconciled to your sister, and then come and present your offering.” (Matt 5:23-25)

“But, Lord, she is wrong about _______!”

"Make friends quickly with your opponent at law while you are with her on the way, in order that your opponent may not deliver you to the judge, and the judge to the officer, and you be thrown into prison.” (Matt 5:23-25)

 “Now, Lord, she started it!”

 “Barbara, it takes two to quarrel.  “What is the source of quarrels and conflicts among you?” (James 4:1-3)

 “Uh . . . I just want to avoid any further arguments.”

"Barbara, if   you  remember that your sister has something against you —  real or imagined  —  leave your offering there before the altar, and go your way; first be reconciled to your sister, and then come and present your offering.” (Matt 5:23-25) She who separates herself seeks her own desire. She quarrels against all sound wisdom. (Proverbs 18:1)

    “Lord . . .”

“My dear determined daughter, a fool does not delight in understanding, but only in revealing her  own mind.” (Prov. 18:1-2)

 “Well, what if  . . . ?”

 “Barbara,  refuse foolish and ignorant speculations, knowing that they produce quarrels. As my bond-servant, child, do not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged, with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses  and escape  from the snare of the devil, having been held captive by him to do his will.” (2 Tim 2:23-26) 

 “But, Lord — isn’t that instruction just for ministers?”

“Barbara, if any man is in Christ, (she)  is  a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. Now all these things are from God, who reconciled you to Himself through Christ, and gave you the ministry of reconciliation, . . . God through Me was reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and He has committed to you  the word of reconciliation.” (2 Corinthians 5:17-19)

“My child you are an ambassador for Me; . . . ” 

“The ministry of reconciliation — that means settling *differences, Lord. And some of those differences maybe mine!”   

 An ambassador follows orders, trusting his sovereign to act. My instructions are make it right when quarrels break-out in the Body that Christ is  building. My instructions, like to any ambassador are to die to a personal point of view.

So, I have gone to sisters in Christ and asked forgiveness for *my* part in causing any separation between us. I went with Christ’s words in my ears: 

"Barbara, if you  remember that your sister has something against you —  real or imagined  —  go; first be reconciled to your sister!  (Matt 5:23-25) “She who separates herself seeks her own desire. She quarrels against all sound wisdom.” (Proverbs 18:1) Let me handle the next step.”

Lord, I believe -- Help thou my unbelief and help me to take that first step.

A Faulty Faucet

Eleven o’clock on a Saturday night  is not the easiest time to find a willing, competent plumber – but we tried a referral, one whose recorded message promised a call-back in a few minutes.   

The hot water in our shower would not shut off last night – in a newly remodeled bathroom. We had installed new fixtures, but some of the stems upon which the bright and shiny brass and porcelain knobs rested were old – indeed, worn out.  The stems were not visible. A crack caused a screw to slip, and a washer fell off, meaning no matter which direction I turned the knob, hot water pulsed through. And no turn-off was readily apparent – meaning the only cut off was in the adjacent alley, under a manhole, close to the fence. Douglas bundled up, for the temperature had dropped to 27 degrees, and valiantly stopped the flow of water.

While he struggled to cut off the water, I quickly filled up a water jug, prepared the morning  coffee, and filled the bathtub so we might flush the toilets. And we settled down awaiting a jingle on the phone. By 12:45 A.M., we gave up and went to bed. At 8:00 A.M. the plumber called, set an appointment, and came, discovering the problem, and fixing it with some new stems and washers.

The simple motion, turning off a faucet, was thwarted. A good thing, hot water, became scalding and harmful because of an aging piece of hardware, hidden from view finally wore out. And one faulty faucet meant shutting down all running water. No running water changes a lot -- stopping many things, anything that I had not made provision for before the water ceased to flow. 

Christ said water was to flow out of me – living water. (John 7:38-39) But sometimes, what comes out of my heart and mouth is as unsafe as that scalding hot water, and the cause may be as  unanticipated as that corroded faucet stem – that cracked under heat and persistent turning. Intemperate speech can also shut down all kinds of things as surely as Doug shut off the water to the house. Unfortunately there is no advance preparation for such a debacle the way I provided for the inconvenience of no running water.  I have scalded other people with my tongue. The only provision I have is that there is a Balm. (Jeremiah 8:22)

The plumber replaced the damaged pieces, turned the water back on, and now the shower turns on and off again – the water’s temperature easily moderated because he reset the temperature on the water heater. What comes from me also can be moderated, though I can’t see or know the stuff in my heart. My heart “. . .  is hopelessly dark and deceitful, a puzzle that no one can figure out.” ( Jeremiah 17:9  from THE MESSAGE )

Grace rests the gauge on my emotions when I remember these things and act:

    God did not die and leave me in charge. “You grab a mad dog by the ears when you butt into a quarrel that's none of your business.” (Proverbs 26:17 from THE MESSAGE )

    God gave me Scripture to get at the corroded corners in my heart and soul. “Who can discern his lapses and errors? Clear me from hidden [and unconscious] faults.” (Psalm 19:12 AMP)

    God has a purpose in my speech. “ When she speaks she has something worthwhile to     say, and she always says it kindly.( Proverbs 31:26 from THE MESSAGE )

"[S]he who believes in Me, as the Scripture said, 'From [her] innermost being shall flow rivers of living water.'"  (John 7:38-39)