Politics and Personal Struggles Aren't a Good Mix

The Governor of Texas, Rick Perry, stated and then recanted what I believe.

"I may have the genetic coding that I'm inclined to be an alcoholic, but I have the desire not to do that, and I look at the homosexual issue the same way."  

John Paulk described that genetic coding is one tough opponent.  (Read more: Life as An Ex-Ex- Gay.) Reading his story it’s plain: Pontification does not disperse or overcome its relentless power.  

I may have a few broken chains in my genetic coding. No arguments, reasoning, cajoling, browbeating or guilt trips were ever as powerful as the deep-seated desire to drink. Was this a glitch in my genetic code?

Maybe. 

I wanted to drink from a very early age, when I saw how much fun grown-ups seemed to have when they drank – or when I saw the slick magazine advertisements.  Many folks in the old family tree had big time trouble with booze. But their example was no cautionary tale; I started in drinking early, knowing I could avoid their mistakes.  I also picked friends who liked to drink, too. Living without alcohol was never an option.

So, towards the end, I changed my outward conduct – to keep people from bugging me about my passion to drink. While I controlled my outward behavior, I was always thinking about the next time I could safely drink. Because I had been around the 12-steps, I knew my “control” would fail – it was just a question of when. I may have pinned the equivalent of a Sumo wrestler, but deep down inside I knew I was about to be flipped.

Still, if I thought about living the whole of my life without another drink –ever – I went wobbly.  I couldn’t live without it, and I wasn’t really living with it. There was no easier, softer way – I had to put the drink down—one day at a time.  Also, I came to believe  that a power greater than myself cares about the choices I make and this helped me see that doing the same thing over and over, hoping for a different outcome, was insane. But, making the choice to put the drink down didn’t change me into a happy camper, who cheerfully did a one-eighty and never looked back.

I never make “perfect” choices – I mess up – I think stupid crazy thoughts, and do not always fight them; some days I so wish I could get to that perfect world to which I thought alcohol was the passport.  But it’s a journey to nowhere good.  So, for today, I choose to be with people who empathize with my struggle, and aren’t trying to fix me – I try and return the favor.

But I mess up here, too.

I wish Christians who are hurting deeply because of  their brokenness weren’t. I don’t know how they can carry on with the pain they describe because of their private lives. But I know God will carry them, and I know going back to Egypt is unwise, no matter how attractive a place it is in our imaginations.  And I am sorry when the church muddles her message and says some of us get a pass to pursue what God has said, don’t.

 Further Thoughts -- an oldie but goodie, and a differing P.O.V.

 So You Want to Go Back Egypt? (Keith Green)

 How a Survivor from a Train Wreck Lives.

  

·      If you are drawn into a controversy use hard arguments and very soft. words: CH Spurgeon


An Afterthought -- Christians may not be able to change their sexual orientation, but we can and do change our conduct.